Friday Fuel - 15 May

We hear a lot about skill, speed, strength, and smarts in sport. But there’s a deeper layer to success — one that separates champions from everyone else.

That layer is character.

Not being a character. Having character. It’s like Winston Wolf says in Pulp Fiction:

At TOVO Academy, Todd Beane teaches the “3 C’s” — Character, Cognition, and Competence. It’s a powerful reminder that if we want to develop great athletes, we must first develop great people.

Because here’s the brutal truth most coaches won’t tell you:

“Physical talent is meaningless without the foundation of character, independence, and self-responsibility.”
– Wayne Goldsmith

💬 Let’s Start With Some Quotes from the Experts:

We love a good quote but this week we couldn’t stop ourselves from throwing four in, as they all resonated greatly.

❔ OK… But What is Character, Especially in Youth Sport?

Stephen Covey believed that true character is the foundation upon which lasting success is built—like the deep, unseen roots of a mighty tree.

Think of character as the “root system” that supports all other growth. Without strong roots, a tree may look healthy but won’t withstand storms—and in the same way, a young athlete without character may succeed temporarily, but won’t thrive under pressure or adversity, and won’t be resilient enough to keep working for the long term at the level required to be great.

If you talk with coaches at the highest echelon they have all noticed the same thing; while others focus on surface-level achievements or quick wins, the parents of great athletes tend to emphasize nurturing values such as integrity, responsibility, self-reliance and respect in their kids, starting at the earliest age.

Covey’s work, especially in The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, teaches that habits like being proactive, keeping commitments, and acting with integrity aren’t just life skills—they're character builders that shape how youth show up in sport, school, and life.

Some common elements coaches use to define character in youth sport are:

✅ 1. Responsibility

• Taking ownership of actions, preparation, and performance.

• Showing up on time, being ready to train, and holding oneself accountable for mistakes.

✅ 2. Work Ethic

• Consistent effort and commitment, especially when motivation is low.

• Pushing through discomfort and not cutting corners.

✅ 3. Resilience

• Bouncing back from setbacks, mistakes, or losses with a growth mindset.

• Viewing challenges as opportunities to improve, not reasons to quit.

✅ 4. Integrity

• Honesty, fairness, and playing by the rules.

• Doing the right thing — even when it won’t benefit them.

✅ 5. Coachability

• Being open to feedback and willing to make changes.

• Listening, asking questions, and showing humility.

✅ 6. Respect

• Treating teammates, opponents, referees, and coaches with dignity.

• Celebrating wins with humility and handling losses with grace.

✅ 7. Self-discipline

• Consistently doing what's necessary, not what's easy.

• Following through on commitments without needing constant reminders.

Don’t worry - we’ve got you.

🛠️ How to Build Character

Character can’t be lectured into existence. It’s earned through the experience of moments like forgetting equipment, failing to prepare, missing out… and learning from it

First, you need a baseline to see what character an individual has.

Try this simple five-minute test. It’s revealed more about future sporting potential than any talent identification program Wayne Goldsmith has encountered in 30 years of coaching.

📍 The next time your child walks in the door after training, stand quietly and observe:

• Do they unpack their own gear?

• Do they put their dirty uniform in the laundry?

• Do they make their own recovery snack?

• Do they prep their bag for the next session?

• Or… do they drop everything at the door, expecting you to handle it all?

Your answer reveals more about their future than any performance stat ever could. When you look behind the closed doors of many the world’s greatest athletes you will see:

🏅 Olympians whose parents refused to carry their gear when they were little

🏀 Pros whose parents made them prep their own food before early-morning practice.

🎓 World-class athletes (and students) whose parents made homework the non-negotiable before training.

There are countless “gifted” kids who fall short — not because they lacked talent, but because they never developed character.

So…you need to…

Step back — and let them figure it out.
Let them feel the consequence of unpreparedness.
Let them take ownership.

That’s how growth happens.

Digging deeper, in John Medina’s Brain Rules he shows that we learn by ACTIVE testing, like a baby does. Often we believe that telling a child something somehow makes them learn it. But you can’t learn fully until you have actually felt it - good or bad.

Another of his rules is Repeat to remember. Things only become habits when they are repeated. From over 20 years in education and coaching, it is clear to us that a few kids get it first time, and others take much longer, repeated experiences to develop characteristics. So remember…

Reward the character element when you see it.

Don’t reward them for forgetting their boots by getting them yourself - instead reward them the next time they remember them.

Don’t reward them for not setting an alarm by waking them up in time. Let them sleep in and be late. Reward them when they set their own alarm and organise themselves in time to leave, when they tell you it is time to leave.

And a ‘well done’ followed by a little hug is usually all a reward they actually need so that they feel seen for what they have done. A reward does not have to be anything large.

📚 Book of the Week

🎓 Brain Rules by John Medina

Website here: https://brainrules.net/

As highlighted above, Brain Rules is a fantastic book that ties into many different aspects of life, helping you understand how to harness the brain to succeed in whatever you want.

It is an easy read with some incredible takeaways within the 12 Principles it discusses. Check out the website too!

🎧 Want to go even deeper on Character ?

• Listen to Todd Beane or Wayne Goldsmith on our Spotify or Youtube Channels

💬 Have you seen character built in your athlete through small everyday moments?

Or seen it dented by negative environments?

We’d love to hear about it. Just hit REPLY and let us know what happening out there.

💥 Here’s to raising strong, kind, focused kids—on and off the field.

Billinda + Ben  

🎙️ The Game Changer | FYA (Fueling Youth Athletes)